As a mum of two children, there is a question I ask myself – Who do I love more?
Naturally and intrinsically, I love the both of them the same. But I also realise that I tend to have more affection for the one whom I spend more time with.
It is true for me, but not sure if it applies to other parents. On days I spend more time with Donna, I tend to pay more attention to her. On the other hand, when I spend lone time with Toby, I cannot help but love him so much more.
Because of this tendency, I want to make a commitment to spend as equal amount of time with each of them as I can. Time alone (if possible) with each of them – without other distractions.
I used to tutor a family of three children and when their parents reached home at the end of the day, they would all rush to their parents. Usually, the eldest one would have most attention because she was the most eloquent. The two younger ones would fight for their parents’ attention but to no avail.
It served as a good reminder to me even as a young adult – that I should never be a parent who favours one over the other. I should love them all the same. And this means that I should divide my time with my two children fairly – not tough but it takes a conscious decision!
Maybe you can try it today!
My two children are great buddies. Although the younger one, Toby is only 10 months old, he is starting to enjoy the companionship of his sister, Donna and will mimic her.
One time Donna stayed overnight at grandparents’ place and when he saw her the next day, he ran to her (in his walker) and started to ‘sayang’ her. In his gibberish, he would tell her how much he missed her.
Recently, he started to laugh at what she laughs at. With the same hearty laugh. When he is awake, he would crawl to her and pull her hair, tugging at her to wake up and play with him.
Donna on the other hand, has a very sweet spirit. When Toby tossed and turned in the middle of the night, he would wake her up with his kicks and cries. However, she would not get upset. On the contrary, she would stroke him on the head, as if to put him back to sleep.
Yes, I know there will come a time when they would get into fights more often than play.
Nevertheless, I take heart that at the end of the day, I am assured that they love each other very much; even without being told to.
I have a dreamland. It is a place called S U P E R M A M A.
It is where I get inspired; challenged; provoked to do something better in life;
It is where I smile at the little plants that blossom under tender loving care;
It is where I cheer up after reading a nice book;
It is where I find my solace;
This dreamland is where I like to be – I miss it when I am not there for days.
I found my dreamland and I am giving my all to make it work, to make it a reality everyday.
Some people say it is not possible.
I choose to think it is!
I hope to see you in your dreamland someday! In the meantime, you can come over to mine : )